Gossip Girl Review: Royal Wedding Dreams, Awful Schemes

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Blair Waldorf got engaged last night on Gossip Girl, while Chuck and Serena vied for the honor of worst person ever. Just another night on the Upper East Side!

As Gossip Girl episodes go, there were certainly plenty of highlights in "The Princesses and the Frog," yet the overall narrative felt sorely lacking to me at times.

The Gossip Girl I like featured strong characters who are both funny and enjoyable to watch. Sure, there's scheming and backstabbing, but they're not ALL bad.

Somewhere along the line, though, the plot lines became really twisted and confusing and the relationships too tangential. Rant over. Let's break down Monday:

S the Back Stabber

Serena sucks. Sorry, but it's true, although you can blame the writers for this. Yes, she's jealous of Blair and sort of mad about Dan. But this is not the S we know.

Serena called Louis' mother to sabotage Blair. Then Serena sent Blair's dirty laundry (because Louis' mom can't read Gossip Girl) to further ruin her friend's chances.

All the while, she lied to Blair's face, except for when she defended Chuck after the party. That was honest at least. S probably believes Blair made the wrong call.

Chuck is on the brink. Not only of going completely off the rails and ending up shot in a seedy alley again, but of running out of excuses for us to make for him.

The Dark Knight broods. He is tormented, and has been dealt a lot of bad breaks. He can't handle emotional situations and drowns himself in booze and sorrow.

The stuff with his father - who we learned had an affair with Avery Thorpe - is not his fault, or something we would wish on anyone. It's gotta mess with his said.

But honestly, Chuck's behavior leaves little room for redemption at this point.

I mean, for someone who loves Blair SO much, he terrified, embarrassed and degraded her - BEFORE he forced himself on her and put his fist through a window.

That's how you treat your dream girl? This was worse than his usual efforts to crush Blair's soul to win her back, but it's not like he hadn't gone that route before.

It's very hard, if not impossible, to "root" for Chair now.

Even Nate can't find it within his man bangs anymore. He pointed out that Chuck's relationship with B is not normal, and blatantly chose Raina over him at the end.

Dair is all but forgotten. At least they were last night. After a slow, well-written lead-up to the Dan and Blair hookup, it's like nothing ever happened with them.

We like Dan, and have no problem with Charlie per se, but we just feel kind of used. Perhaps more importantly, GG needs to bring back Dan and Nate's bromance.

Princess Blair

Blair Waldorf is engaged! I couldn't care less that the royal family doesn't approve, but I worry more that she's been dating Prince Louis for about four days.

Blair's life may not be the fairy tale she thinks it is, but I admire her for wanting to spend it with a guy who treats her right and who genuinely makes her happy.

Louis is nice to her, and handsome. Gotta give him that. But is she really following her heart? Is she following what her brain says her heart is supposed to feel?

I love you to pieces, B, but remember, it's okay to dial it back a little. Prince William and Kate Middleton were together for the better part of 10 years. Ten years.

Think they'll actually get married? Do you want them to after Chuck's antics? At this point I'm willing to give the prince a chance, but suggest a long engagement.

Charlie is a regular Upper East Sider. Florida Schmorida. Between her elaborate plans to woo Dan, manipulating V and name-dropping Bing, girl's a natural!

You gotta love that Charlie insisted on confronting Vanessa alone at the end, and basically showed that even an outsider can thoroughly outshine an outcast.

How long until this new crazy side comes out in a bad way, however? Will her feelings for Dan erupt into a huge mess if he decides to pursue Blair (please yes)!

Rufus got a job! What house husband?! Hang up the waffle iron and the butler outfit, because the Fonz is totally going to be the manager of a band called Panic!

Vanessa is leaving at the end of the semester to study abroad. Approve.

What did you think of last night's Gossip Girl? Can you find anything positive to say about Chuck? What is Charlie's endgame? Leave a comment below to discuss!

Review

Editor Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.2 / 5.0 (297 Votes)

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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@are you kidding: abuse is abuse. nothing justifies it.

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so far almost all the scenes of the big 5 episodes promo were sawn, except from the sex scene in next episode . and i know this is discouraging for dair since the girl wasn't blair, but dan is definatelly at the final parties, he arrives with a limouzine and stands there with the croud. Of course is unlikely to confess to blair(charlie won't let him)but you never know... because ther is no hard evidence on what happens in the last episode. we don't see chuck or louis or dan but we can assume they are in the final party. i wish that blair at least will consider dan as another option when she take the final decicions so that even if she doesn't choose him there might be hope for season 5 and i wish dan won't end up with the crazy cousin and mentain his feeling for blair at least for the summer, because i don't want to forget her immediatelly, like she appears to do with him...

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@Cherry: there is a difference between hit and threat someone!!!

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I am all for Dan and Blair = DAIR

Fanbandc

I understand perfectly how you feel the truth is that chapter of yesterday left a void in me, as much confusion. I do not know how the producers came to this point because if we wanted to show a bottoming Chuck everything that was happening I think the scene with Blair was too much a part of me wants to think he has something planned to treat to justify this episode but otherwise seems to want to end definitively Chair. I have low expectations for this season so it is no exaggeration to say but have broken my heart and my mind to Chair and I doubt that we have a final office, not after what we saw yesterday, is that their relationship after 4 seasons has been twisted and manipulative but I think that crossed the line and so far I do not think Blair should let this go so easily. I feel sad I have nothing to say.

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Does anyone else think that next week Chuck is going to be taken out of the running all together and Dan will step up in the finale and she'll have to choose between the fairytale and real life?

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I think this is an exciting episode. I did not care much about the prince at first but this episode really made me realize the prince is an awesome person because of all the things he did. No girl could ask for more. As for Chuck.....ugh, I don't know what to say anymore. Perhaps the writers did this so that they can spend the next many episodes redeeming him because they ran out of plot twists? As for Charlie, yuck, I thought she might be different because she was so "innocent" and all. Man, she's a natural. The Rhodes blood runs strong. I'm sure she'll get some kind of trouble later because it's part of the classic GG formula: 1. outsider girl becomes bitch 2. she gets pwned 3. she leaves GG. Serena in this episode seemed possessed. Enough said. To those of you who argued "this is NOT domestic violence; he DID NOT hurt her": Do you even know what you're talking about? The psychological strain of being threatened is at an equal level, if not more, than the actual physical hit. What if YOU get cornered by someone with a deranged look threatening you with a fist, but did not end up actually hitting you? Would you say it's acceptable because hey, you were never really hit? Wow.

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@Chair Is Endgame: I just checked, and you're right, I mixed up the scenes...but I'm still pretty sure that Blair told yes to the Louis, I mean, it would be rude NOT to give an answer... but you're totally right, she went to Chuck first. I just immediately thought that she had said yes before.:) I want the NonJudgingBreakfastClub (and Lily) to help Chuck.
I want Blair to confide in Dan (yes, I'm a Dair fan, but it's ok if they're just friends).
I want Georgina to come back, gang up with the team and bring Jack Bass down and help Chuck. Oh, and on her way out, show Charlie who's the *real* bitch in town. But most of all, I want to see Vanya's "Eastern-european style". LOL:

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Reina has to be the worst character in television history. Everytime she's on screen, i feel awkward. Doesn't help either that the actress is utterly atrocious.

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Chair forever! I do wish that someone would give Chuck some help and then somehow win Blair back....I love them together...