The Gossip Girl Reality Scale

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Last night's Gossip Girl, "The Townie," ended 2010 with a bang, as our official review notes, setting the stage for big things to come when the show returns Jan. 24.

It's time for one of our favorite pieces of Gossip Girl media coverage, N.Y. Magazine's patented reality index. Behold, the last plus-minus scale of the calendar year:

  • The Gossip Girl homepage reads: “Serena Seeks Support.” After we stopped laughing, we decided this should be the title of the series. Plus 1.
  • For the first time in recent memory, Dan is forced to face that Serena is his half-sister, spurring a gushing Ostroff Center confession. Plus 3.
  • Dan, of course, is the first person to think of using Gossip Girl for good, rather than evil. Plus 5, because it’s not like her to hold back info.
  • A boy who is passed out at the high school party has “I [heart] balls” written on his forehead. As Blair says, “At least he’s owning it.” Plus 5.
Glamorous Upper East Sider
  • Why exactly did Blair, who went over to Dan’s loft to explain what had happened, wait to explain it all again the next day over espresso? Minus 3.
  • Anne Archibald: “No party is more important than family.” Ha! Parties are more important than anything except moving the plot forward. Minus 4.
  • Serena's impassioned speech to her mother about how she put the wrong man in prison is undercut by some serious camel toe action. Minus 2.
  • Kids don’t go to their parents’ homes in Connecticut to buy drugs on break, as Damien says. They stock up at school to take them home. Minus 5.

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Quotes

And who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell ... You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl

[to Jenny] That's the thing. You need to be cool to be queen. Anne Boleyn thought only with her heart and she got her head chopped off. So her daughter Elizabeth made a vow never to marry a man. She married a country. Forget boys. Keep your eye on the prize, Jenny Humphrey. You can't make people love you, but you can make them fear you. For what it's worth, you're my Queen. I choose you.

Blair