This week's episode of Family Guy opened with a Terri Schiavo musical.  While it had a few laughs courtesy of the adorable kids, including Stewie dressed as a plug that might have been pulled had he not had stage fright, we're going to have to agree with Chris... too late.

From there, the plot line of "Peter-assment," was as disjoint as any Family Guy episode we can remember in recent times.  After filming Stewie's play, Peter soon became a papparazo for all of five minutes before Ali Williams broke his glasses forcing him to wear contacts.

That, of course, randomly provoked his boss at the brewery, Angela (Carrie Fischer) to fall for a doughy-eyed Peter once she could see his beautiful eyes slash eye lashes.  After that, the episode really began after wasting the first half on a failed-papparazi plot line.  Sure the TMZ joke worked, but talk about a waste of a potential story and entire first half an episode.

Ridiculous plot lines aside, we watch Family Guy for its jokes, and there were a few decent ones that worked for us.  Our favorite bit was definitely Peter hiding both Glen and Mort in his pants in order to sleep with Angela and not technically cheat on Lois.

The best line, however, had to be Glen popping out of Peter's pants, being unable to sleep with Angela.  The exact wording and the other Family Guy quotes from this mediocre episode are after the jump.

Peter: Richard. Hey Richard. Can I get your uatograph?
Richard Dreyfus: Fine. You have a pen and paper?
Peter: What do I look like a Staples? I don't carry that stuff around.
Richard Dreyfus: Look I'm sorry I can't help you.
Peter: What you're too big and famous to go to the corner drug store and pick up a pen and paper and possibly some other groceries I need and come back and sign several things for me? You're a jerk. | permalink

Peter: I really hope there's a hungry horse back there. | permalink

Peter: I don't want to have to take off my clothes because I'm self-conscious about my Congressman Barney Frank body. | permalink

Quagmire: Hi Angela. I'm Peter's friend, Glen Quagmire. Thanks for having me in your home and I would have had sex with you but Peter neglected to tell me you were a dumpster fire. Some friend, huh? | permalink

Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.